By Joshua D. Copeland

Staff Writer

A walk to your next class can be quite a workout at times at CSUSM. Thank God (with pun possibly intended) for leggings and yoga pants as they keep you cool as well as comfy.

Most importantly, a lot of you ladies look great in them. It only makes sense to throw on a pair for a productive day at school.

Especially if you want to be called a “WHORE” in the name of Jesus Christ.

The extremely radical, self-proclaimed evangelist, Sister Cindy a.k.a. the Tampon Lady and her husband “blessed” CSUSM with their presence on Tuesday, March 3.

They share the desire of your typical Christians, carrying out the message of Jesus Christ loving you and wanting to save you from the depths of Hell. However, their attention-grabbing methods are ridiculously judgmental, delivering a harshly potent sting of irony.

“All you ladies wearing your leggings and your shorts are whoring your bodies,” the Tampon Lady said to students, while holding her giant, trusty sign with “WHORE” written in bold caps.

In fact, she had three signs in total. The other two signs said, “Don’t Be a Ho No Mo’!” and “You Deserve Hell.”

It wasn’t long before a circle of students began to surround her in amusement. Some found her hilarious and broke out in laughter. Others grew angry and found her offensive.

“You women are supposed to come to school for an education. Not to find a boy to come fondle your tits in your dorm room!” she said.

At this point, some students began to reciprocate measures of extremity. One student attacked her and her props. Another experienced a spark of exhilaration and exposed her breasts to the crowd with the intent of self-liberation. There were even homosexual couples engaging in make-out sessions trying to get under her skin.

“Yeah, she called me a whore, too when I wore short shorts,” said CSUSM Alumni, Ruth Rosales. “The dude [husband] also told me no one loved me, not my parents, not my boyfriend, no one except God.”

“I was told I was going to hell because I was wearing black but the only skin I was showing was my face and hands. And also a whore,” Linguistics student, Danni Marie Dickey, said.

Before her husband took over the performance, one of the last things the Tampon Lady said to the crowd was this:

“I’m not here to force you to accept Jesus… But you have two choices: Either you can accept the love of Jesus Christ into your heart, or you can burn in Hell’s lake of fire for all eternity!  Hey, I’m just here to warn you, so that when he does come, I don’t want to hear you guys whining ‘W-a-a-a-a-n-h! Nobody helped me!’”

What if this was how Jesus Christ himself gathered his followers?  Better yet, imagine the Son of God appearing before us that day and being met with the scowling Tampon Lady holding her signs that suggest feminine propaganda. Who then, at that moment, would really need saving?

Christianity is supposed to be about love and acceptance. Those who have accepted Jesus in their hearts found it much easier through love than through fear. But it’s hard to spread God’s word when people like the Tampon Lady represent all Christians.

“Real Christians literally love on everyone,” said Michelle Jaro, a student of computer information systems and fellow Christian.

And that’s how it should be, even with leggings on.