1. Today, my son asked “Can I have a bookmark?” and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn’t know my name is Brian.
2. If a child refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
3. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
4. A slice of apple pie is $2.50 in Jamaica and $3.00 in the Bahamas. These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
5. When a dad drives past a graveyard: Did you know that’s a popular cemetery? Yep, people are just dying to get in there!
6. MOM: “How do I look?” DAD: “With your eyes.”
7. What does a zombie vegetarian eat? “GRRRAAAAAIIIINNNNS!”

Source:   https://www.boredpanda.com/funny-dad-jokes-puns/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic