One thing the classic 1989 film, When Harry Met Sally, taught us was that “men and women can’t be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.”

The “sex part” that character Harry is referring to is the potential that a man and a woman will have sex. That does not necessarily mean they both want to.

A common misconception is that guys and girls can’t be friends only if there is a physical attraction between the two.

Senior Haylee Ruiz says that guys and girls can only be friends “in certain circumstances.” “If you’re both very attracted to each other, probably not. If you’ve already dated before and know it doesn’t work; you might be able to move past that and build a friendship, but I don’t think it will be a ‘close’ friendship.”

While mutual physical attraction is one of the reasons why girls and guys can’t be just friends, it isn’t the only reason.

There are times when two people are not physically attracted to each other, but they still just can’t be close friends. This is because others outside of the friendship will always see the sex part in a heterosexual male and female friendship.

For instance, junior Greg Parker says that being in a relationship “does make it more difficult” to be friends with members of the opposite sex. He continues by saying that he has “felt pressured not to talk to the opposite gender,” while he was in a relationship.  

This is because people get jealous of the idea that a person might be intimate with their friend. Even if they trust you, the possibility that you might want to have sex with them is still ingrained  whether it’s true or not. This isn’t something they would think of if you are friends with someone of the same sex. This is why girls and guys can’t truly be close friends, because sex will always be a part of the friendship.

The character Harry ended up being right when he and Sally had sex with one another, years after being close friends. So you might think it’s possible that you and your opposite gender friend can remain good friends, but I would place money on the fact that it won’t always be the case. You’ll never just be friends.